If you’re
one of those people who buy self-help books to get happier, skinnier or richer…. stop wasting your money.
These books don’t work and will end up in a drawer until your next garage sale when some other sucker will
buy it for a half a buck.
Do you think for a minute that the people that write
these books have answers that can turn your life around? I doubt it! And why would you believe their advice anyway; because
it says Doctor or Psychotherapist in front of their names.
I have a friend who wrote
a three-hundred-and-seventy-two page book on how to motivate yourself to be a more positive person. Not surprisingly, this
guy is more depressing than watching Suze Orman sunbathe naked at Haulover Beach. But he’s a shrink and got a publishing
deal that makes him lots of money. When he speaks to his fans they can’t get enough of his advice
and when he’s home he’s fighting with his wife and kids.
When we’re delivered to this
world, we’re already pre-wired to be who we are. Not everyone is created to be happy, rich, skinny, beautiful, healthy,
successful, polite and smart...that's just the way it is! We were not cheated by God and have no reason to be resentful,
jealous or angry. So get over it… and furthermore, it’s not rocket science knowing how to
better our lives; and it’s certainly not written in a book for thirty bucks. It’s just COMMON SENSE!
When it came to my delivery, God
clearly did not want me to be tall, dark, thin, handsome, extremely bright or rich - but was damn thoughtful to give me life.
I’m
not a Doctor, Therapist or have special powers, so I follow my own 5 step program to be happy.
Dr. Stu’s
5 Common Sense Steps to a happier life –
1)
HANG OUT WITH HAPPY PEOPLE – Happiness spreads faster than Paris Hilton’s legs. If you’re
sitting around with mopey friends and the chatter is negative, depressing or
gloomy, get your ASS out of there ASAP.
2) SHITTY FOODS PUT YOU IN SHITTY MOODS
– Maybe not when you’re eating them but soon thereafter. Show me a happy person who kvetches about heartburn
and indigestion and I’ll show you Megan Fox’s penis.
3) GET OFF YOUR BUTT AND EXERCISE…Not
two times a year but five days a week. Statistics show that if you don’t exercise to stay fit, you’ll
play with yourself more frequently; because no one else will.
4) ERADICATE STRESS – That
is more difficult but can be done if you follow the above steps.
5)
AND FINALLY - Don’t obsess about being happy,
beautiful or skinny. After all, Rosie O’Donnell makes a great living being miserable, ugly and fat.
And so can you! It’s just COMMON SENSE!
